Wednesday, December 14, 2016

The Confused State of a Capable Mind

Sometimes I feel that high potential capabilities can also turn into curse when not managed properly. Have you met a person who has shown real talent and high potential as a kid, but is going through series of failures and major setbacks later in life?

When you are young and perform well, especially as per societal norms, there is so much appreciation around and you start liking it. People praising gives your confidence a boost and you do even better. But after some time when you step out of the comfort zone and walk straight into the Real world, the reality hits you hard on your face. And suddenly those words of appreciation start fading. That’s when the real challenge starts. As an individual, you rely so much on encouraging words and suddenly they are nowhere to be found. You get weighed down by the Expectations! And thus, I wonder, how efficiently we damage the capable mind and make it follow the same rules, for which it was never meant to. Has the Capable Mind become curse for that individual?

Thursday, November 3, 2016

I Wonder !

That stupid feeling! It has to go.
If it doesn’t I am going to drown in it. That can’t be good.
But what is this that is pulling me from inside, I wonder! All that is great and all that is alright is not enough, I wonder why?
Can I go beyond what’s scary and difficult? And when?



Monday, April 4, 2016

Another Beautiful Day

When I was riding to office, my heart was filled with warmth & happiness and I had a smile on my face. So thought of capturing another beautiful day in my life. So here it goes . . .


 
A beautiful day 
Sleeping early the previous night helped me wake up early today. With just couple of hours early filled me with so much of energy & enthusiasm.

With taking my dog out for a walk & making sure I pester my husband till he finally gets out of the bedJ, the day began beautifully. Little time on the roof trying to save ourselves from eagles & do some stretches followed by little yoga in the room, filled my heart with happiness. Happy for spending time with hubby & watching Frodo following me everywhere and doing the shavasan next to me.

It started as a perfect day with breakfast at home and packing lunch (phew finally!!)
And even the ride to office gave me the confidence to tackle the rest of the day.
So this has to be continued.. Early to Bed & Early to Rise.. Makes me Happy, happy and Happy J

 

Saturday, September 27, 2014

Scared of Unknown

Why am I scared?
I wish I knew the answer.
All i want is to sleep peacefully,  but still wide awake. It's all difficult to understand.  I am looking for the ease in life. .for that Kick!
Hope to find it soon. .Amen!

Thursday, September 18, 2014

What is it??

I am not sure what is wrong. I am in a flight. .leaving home and heading to Bangalore,  which has essentially become my home now.  I should be happy to be back.
But here I am sitting with tears trickling down my cheeks, unable to stop them..unable to hide them. I don't even know the reason!
There is a feeling of mourning,  as if something has died in me.
I am supposed to be happy. .recently married to the man of my choice..who loves me, in laws who are kind to me, family who has gone against all the social norms and has accepted my inter-cast marriage with full heart. And yeah. ..there is an increment in salary too. So technically nothing wrong in personal and professional front.
But this constant feeling of sadness is killing me. As if there is an obsession of being sad all the time.

What is it that I want?
What is it that I need?
What is it that my heart is searching for?

May be someday I'll have answers...May God someday arrives soon!

Stranger in Me!

I don't know what is this? The sense of love & connection or the fear of commitment.
I think both. But the unsettling feeling is something I don't like. It feels like the happiness is still a little out of reach.
I was glad to notice that now I don't feel that all the sad songs in the world were written specifically for me. Hopefully will reach to a level when I will have a different feeling that all the Happy songs are written for me :) Amen!
So many things need to be sorted, it seems time is running out! Only if I could save some for myself.

Life doesn't get easier, you just get stronger!

I read this today morning in someone's blog who compares how life has changed in years. He compares the story of yesteryear blockbuster Abhimaan and the newly released Aashiqui2. The stories of two movies is more or less same but the difference in the way they end has got him thinking and questioning the mindset of today's youth.
This I feel is very close to what everyone thinks these days. The amount of pressure we have..rather say ..we create for ourselves is humongous. It's all in our heads. I guess we are in the practice of exaggerating everything. The new generation loves to Show-off, some where the humility that used to be the most possessed virtue is becoming a sign of No Aggressiveness and feeling Too Content. That is why..any small success we see, which is mostly the Beginners Luck, it goes right into our heads and we feel we are indispensable. But are we really indispensable? We are certainly not...and that's where we feel we are loosing. Followed by this..the habit of exaggeration comes into picture..and even minor setbacks look so huge that we feel that the world is crashing and just can't take it anymore. 

Wednesday, May 8, 2013

Green Question Mark ???


Old Post - I think 3.5 years old.. Thought of publishing it today :)

Green Question Mark..... Great! Does the color signifies the Life or the question signifies My Life - Mystery!!


Life:

7:0 am - Wake-up
7:35 am - Take dogs for warning walk to the park
7:55 am - Think about "To COOK or To not COOK"
8:30 am - Make-up
8:45 am - Dress-up
9:00 am - Run to the car ; feel relieved if tyres are not deflated.
9:30 am - Store shutter-up
7:45 pm - Leave the store .. driving begins......
8:30 pm - Reach home , take dogs to park
8:55 pm - finally enter the house properly n relax
9:00 pm - Watch tv... and "To COOK or To not COOK"

The Question remains the same  -  
Green Question Mark..... Great! Does the color signifies the Life or the question signifies My Life - Mystery!!







Tuesday, May 7, 2013

I was Jealous!


That feeling of jealousy came back to me after a looong loooong time.
It suddenly hit me.. that I was jealous of her!

No apparent reason. Till date I had never felt insecured about him or felt any reason to be worried. The comfort is the "Thing" of our relationship, But when I saw him talking to her more.. I felt neglected. I didn't like it. Acting all pretty.. that female.. I think it was very evident that didn't like her the moment I saw her. The reaction was instantaneous. Everyone teasing and telling me she was his crush .. the uncomfortable feeling..I was happy to know that place was closing for the day where we were supposed to go..she to come along, but Yessss she left early :) ..else how long would I have held it?

That feeling of jealousy came back to me after a looong loooong time.
It suddenly hit me...that I was jealous of her.

Thursday, November 1, 2012

To be or Not to be..

This is the question of my life. It seems like a never ending puzzle that will never be sorted. Sometime I get a feeling that all is well and there it is - the new beginning!
And suddenly......Wooaaassssshhhhh!!! All gone.

Such is life, I suppose.
Then there is a question of hope, that never dies in my case. May be I am insanely stupid and idiotically optimistic, but that's what keeps me going. The God is the real accountant that keeps a track of what you have done and what you didn't. It's the real source of energy that tells me, I can still conquer the World! I just might be a little slow than I thought and a little broken from here and there. But in the end, it's going to be Worth it! 

Sunday, September 23, 2012

Wish You a Happy Change ...

A Change is what I have been witnessing all this while...
A Change is what I have been wishing for all this while..
A Change is what I welcome now!!

Its not the best..but it's the Best I can have at the moment..and I cherish it... I thank God for this :)

It's really not about what you can quantify.. and say mine is better than yours... but it's about what is meant for you. Something that can suit only to you. I am feeling that and the feeling is Awesome :)

When I get up in the morning, I have all the energy and enthusiasm to look forward to the wonderful day I am going to have. I still get cold feet at times and feel the unsettling feelings, but then the thought pops-up in my mind, it's OK. And even if it is not.. It's OK :)

All I hope is to be able to hang on to this thin rope of hope for the rest of my life and be grateful to the God Almighty and my parents for giving me this wonderful life!!

Monday, May 31, 2010

Sunny day





A Beautiful sunny morning!



Waking up early morning...trying to excersise...some jumping here & thr while looking at some wierd musical aerobics...then a loooong warm shower.... still having time to roam around here & thr after getting dressed..

A nice healthy breakfast.
A hot cup of tea...exactly at the time i needed it...standing in the balcony holding that cup in hand...sipping slowly and watching the sun-rise..
Cool & calm sunrays on my face...trying to soak every thing pretty around me....
That is how my morning was...
A nice Sunny morning.... wid lovely rays falling on my face...filling my heart wid its warmth...

A Beautiful sunny morning!

Thursday, December 10, 2009

The complications of life seem to be never ending.... One moment you feel everything is going to be OK..
and the next moment your world seems to be Crashing!!

The other day a thought came in to my mind which is the status of my Gmail chat these days " Life is an UNSOLVABLE Puzzle". But I need instant relief and desperately need few of the untangled strings to straighten out.

Waiting for the God's Grace!!


Friday, October 2, 2009

HeAd AchE !!!


I am having head ache coz I've not spoken for ages...
Others have it coz I open my mouth to speak...

Such a dull day it is today... I am bored...
Bored of sitting here idle...just feel like doing anything.. Longing to lie down straight to ease this back ache...
It was so hard today to get out of the bed... Just didn't feel like coming for work.

I need a break... I need to relax... I need to rejuvenate...
I want to go to a Spa...I want to go for a Bungee Jumping.... I want to play with water in a pool...
I want to just lie down on a beach... or immerse myself in the salty sea-water...
I want to to sit on the steepest nook of a hill and scream my lungs out...

I want to be FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.............!!!!!!!!
I Want to FLYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY.....................!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sunday, September 27, 2009

Lonesome....!!

Loneliness??? what is it???
Is it when nobody is around you or it's when you are completely crowded but nobody is with you??
Difficult questions..isn't it? :)
The loneliness can do wonders to you. You can think, feel and do and also you can keep on cribbing about being alone. But what to do when you are surrounded by people. They are there with you all the times, but still you are alone.
What to do then????
Though one to answer..... Help me solve it
(an old post)

Sunday, September 20, 2009

????

Its human nature to try to do something what everybody does...
the way I am trying to make an attractive & deep bog title right now...
Didn't get anything ...so thought of going ahead with my thoughts.

What is it that binds us to have a good reputation in other person's mind...when we actually know how deep ly we are immersed in water....naah...not water.... in DIRTY water.
Still we keep on trying that..

Why is there this image boundation...to be good to all. To please everybody, and you end up messing up everything. Nobody is happy and you are completely bewildered that what went wrong???
You did everything you could...you even sacrificed a lot of things you once loved... Then everybody should be happy...enjoying it...!!
But Alas! ... now they are sad for somethingelse...and expect you to push even more...

How long can this happen???
What's your endurance level???
When is there expectations going to end???
When are you going to achive the FINAL HAPPINESS???

Nobody knows it...not even YOU...unless one day you realise... you are DEAD!!!

Sunday, February 8, 2009

rise and fall...........!!!!!!!

Sunday, August 24, 2008

Kiss Kiss Bang Bang !!






The frog is being kissed by this beautiful young princess. Such a nice beautiful story... But then all of a sudden a strange thought popped up in my mind...what if the frog didn't want to be kissed? what if he was happy being a frog than being a prince? doesn't anyone care of the frog's opinion?

What would have happened if even one of the questions was true.. there would be no nice tale to narrate to kids... and there would be no prince & princess living "Happily Everafter !! "



Good that nobody cared about frog's opinions.....else he would have always remained a frog!! :-)

Wednesday, July 9, 2008

the ZAHIR

Wats the ZAHIR......

something which is around you all the time... something which occupies the major portion of your thinking time... or some crap you cannot come out and which doesn't let you live...



wats the ZAHIR for me... will share with you when i get to know it!!!

Wednesday, December 26, 2007

keep calling me

ya.... plz keep calling me...otherwise.. life's pretty boring..
what i mean to say is.. its pretty but boring..
i try to make it hapening...but...
its just that these happening things not happening much these days...
so please...
keep calling me....!!